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All of the Above
“We have a test next week.”
“Come wash the dishes.”
“Your aunt is coming into town.”
“Darren Criss is at the bottom of the pool.”
“The homework is double-sided.”
“You have an essay due at the end of the week.”
“Oh, wait, you thought it was Friday? Nope. It’s only Tuesday.”
A boy in my English class died in a car accident last week. I wasn’t really friends with him, but we’d talk at parties and he made the class fun with all the stupid things he’d say. When we had to read aloud, the entire class always nominated him to do it, because he actually made it fun. I never, ever saw him without that big, stupid smile on his face. It was beautiful, braces never stopped him. He was such a nice guy, never would he intentionally make someone feel bad. Goddammit, he made everybody happy. I just don’t think he knew how many people he affected in the 17 years that he was alive. I miss him. I wasn’t even close to him and I miss him. I cry for him a lot, but I feel like I’ve run out of tears to cry. English isn’t the same.
I went to his funeral the other day and somehow, despite the crying, it made me feel happy. Everyone there couldn’t help but laugh at some of the stories people told, and the video tribute to him was beautiful. They played ‘I’m Sexy and I know It’ during the actual funeral, his favorite song. He would have loved it. Fucking hell, I’m about to cry. I’ve seen the pictures of his car after the accident. Nobody deserves a fate like that. Nobody. I’ll never understand why this happened, or why I’m feeling the way I am despite not being good friends with him.
I went to a paddle out for him yesterday morning too. This is the crazy bit. When everybody paddled out into the ocean and formed a circle, and after everybody released balloons into the air and threw flowers into the circle for him, the tiniest fraction of a rainbow appeared in the sky. I’m not kidding, a rainbow appeared in the sky. I’m far from religious, but I can’t help feeling that it was him letting us know that he was there with us.
I miss you Clyde Psaltis. Rest in peace buddy.
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